We are rewarded for what we do – not what we don’t do.
Many women will tend to agree that choosing to say Yes to this & No to that is challenging. The answer for how we engage in life and meet expectations is mostly Yes, I can or Yes I will do it. Somehow it is easier to do it ourselves. We may think we need to do it all, or are led to believe we should.
The risk with doing it all can result in the consistent rumble of low-level stress. It is hard to switch off and relax. As if the doing itself has become automatic.
The doing becomes a hard habit to break-through.
HOW TO LOVINGLY BREAK-THROUGH IN 3 STEPS
How do we learn to implement healthy boundaries whilst maintaining our value?
Understanding how to create healthy boundaries is a feminine aware process. Instead of rushing to come up with solutions, you are encouraged to develop a relationship with your voice, your emotions and your feminine needs.
This balances the outward expression of action with an holistic approach. You intuitively learn when to take action and when to do less.
1. Take a step back from the problem
Learn to be the observer of your actions. In a way, you are stepping back from the exhausting nature of figuring out why you are doing too much or how to get off the doing too much treadmill. Instead of trying to fix the challenge, you are moving into a place of self observation. You are turning your attention towards the person who can make the biggest difference; and that is you.
2. Focus on you
A gentle, practical enquiry is to genuinely ask yourself: Why am I doing what I am doing right now?
You may not get an answer right away. If you can, ask this question each time you notice the low level of stress impacting how you feel about yourself.
Let the answers come to you. You are not looking for fixing a problem here. The feminine process allows an unveiling of your best answers for your highest good.
3. I Wonder Mindset
Healthy boundaries are aligned with listening and time. This is about your relationship with yourself. Once you discover your WHY's, be kind enough to ask yourself - I wonder what I truly need right now? Let the answers arise from your sub-sconscious.
The 'I Wonder Mindset' is open and willingly to discover possibilities not yet considered.
All of which naturally causes a re-evaluation of your boundaries.
A note on self-doubt. You may have moments of doubt that it is possible to create healthy Yes - No boundaries. you are not alone. Rest assured, healthy boundaries are about taking action that aligns with your highest good.
Here's a message of inspiration from an incredibly busy, determined woman who made the shift with grace and dignity. You can do it too.
"I had my own best answers all along. I just needed to look into my brave heart and take action". Eleanor, Thought Leader, Alternative Health, Australia.
More on boundaries in the next blog.
Read Eleanor's story here
Anna Schaumkel is the founder and mentor of annaschaumkel.com Conversations for Women, the feminine way. Anna is committed to the betterment of women in the world. Connect with Anna here
